Monday, July 2, 2012

Talked to a friend last night who understands and has been through it all. I was told that intelligence comes at a price. The fastest race cars are the most fickle (or the most wrecked in my opinion). Long store short, what is it I need? Medication. I've tried everything else there is and I'm getting worse all the time.

I scheduled for a professional evaluation today. Had to tell them over the phone that I'm mentally stable enough to not pose a threat to myself or anyone around me. I'm still functional on my worst day but I constantly feel like I'm on the verge of a major breakdown. I took some online manic depression test today and passed it with flying colors. It was as if they were writing about me. Anxiety, agitation, frustration, hopelessness, low self worth, overactive thoughts, shortened sleep schedule, periods of hyperactivity, etc. you get it, me!

Came home and got the worst news on my exam and I'm not freaking out about it. Here's the thing, I can handle catastrophes very well. It's the day-to-day kind of crap that I can't deal with. It is what it is. I either get into a school I want to go to or I don't. If not then law school is just not in the cards for me.

Just saw on FB that it's the 7th wedding anniversary for this friend. I remember being at his wedding. Time is really flies. 

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