Friday, April 17, 2015

Scallions

On my way to a the Chinese supermarket in Flushing I passed by an old Chinese man holding a plate of sad looking scallions. Or was it him who looked sad. Or were those chives? Whatever those were I didn't want them. I despise scallions. The look of the old man haunted me. After I walked into the store I thought maybe I should do something on my way out. Then I thought, what if I miss him? I promptly walked back to ask him how much the scallions were. "$1 a bunch. $2. $2" I handed him $2. 

I didn't want the green things. For a second I thought about refusing them. Then I noticed that a boy came over to help him to put the greens in a recycled plastic bag for grapes. I saw his hands were shaking. My heart dropped. I froze. I knew I had to take whatever they hand me even if it was the last thing I did. That was my purpose. More than the $2, I was there to make him feel purposeful. I suddenly realized that no matter how hard things get most of us still want to feel like a useful member of our society.

Then I remembered what you had told me about your impression of the poor people in China, how they always looked for constructive things to do or make little things to sell to make ends meet, how they didn't just sit around and complained about their situation or caused disruptions to others. I've never made such distinction myself until today. You're right. It's a different outlook on life. There's this really strong sense of dignity and respect that runs thousands of years deep. I now recall seeing old ladies in Suzho selling bracelets made from flowers taken from trees nearby. I should have bought a few. They were beautiful and fragrant.

I wanted to do more for the man but I didn't know what. Would he have refused a donation? When I passed by him again later I saw another woman doing the same double take I did. I watched them for a few seconds from across the street. She looked like a real fan of scallions. There is hope in this world no matter how dismal things may seem at times. We have to believe that to get by.

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